by Lauren Rae

10 Stages Of Being A Bridesmaid

It’s happened – a member of your clan has finally accepted the ring, in exchange for her heart and a wedding dress or whatever. It’s a joyous occasion, there are still a number stages of planning to come, but it’s happened – they put a ring on it!

Your BFF’s freshly manicured nails and her blinged up ring finger, with the words ‘I SAID YES’ are all over IG. She’s asked you to be not only a bridesmaid, but her maid of honour and an honour indeed it is. From here on out you are not, I repeat NOT to complain of the hellish, bridezilla behaviours that are surely to follow. Just rest assured that it’ll be over in 365 days or so.

So few of us know the actual real life stages of being in the bridal party. Having learned a couple of things in the past year, I’m here to inform you of the gruelling stages to follow, buckle up… it isn’t easy but it is fun.

The Initial Excitement

It’s natural to be excited when being cast with the bridesmaid title. After all, you’ll be front and centre with the bride and have a pretty dress chosen for you, subsequently avoiding all the ‘what the F do I wear’ dramz. Much like that of Monica accepting the role of making Rachel’s decisions in F.R.I.E.N.D.S, your role is to be taken just as seriously as your 9-5. You MUST remain excitable even when the pressures may tear apart your social life.

Accepting Your Role As Resident Photographer

During fittings, trial dresses, shoes and anything remotely ‘bridey’ that you see in passing. Take a photo, the words ‘I saw this thing and thought of the wedding’ simply won’t do. The bride will need hardcore photographic evidence or it didn’t happen and is completely pointless to the structure of the empire wedding you’re attempting to build with the bride!

Remember, You Are The Brides ‘Go To’

Planned surprises, wedding gifts, Snapchat filters – the works, you are the wedding PA and the sooner you accept this role the better. Admittedly, many wedding decorators, cake makers and MUA’s will be confused when the bride turns up with a name that isn’t yours, but after a brief explanation and the evident stress wrinkle lines on your forehead, it’ll all become clear.

Searching For The Wedding People

By now you’ll have realised that being a part of the bridal party isn’t simply showing up on the day and looking (and behaving) your absolute best. In fact, it’s quite the opposite and you have a hand in making the day a reality. This means researching like you’re repeating your final year dissertation and having a hand in searching for people to make the day a reality.

Finding ‘THE’ Dress Stress

Admittedly finding the dress is difficult and this particular stage includes panic, frustration, a little more panic and incessant rants over how you’ll ‘never find the dress for you’. But this is all totally normal. You eventually do find the dress, and it meets all of the brides demands, be that colour length and how much skin you’re allowed to show at an adult wedding.

Loss Of Ignition And Willpower

At one point or another in the process, you will feel like it’s all been for nothing and that the panic and stress of who won’t reply to your emails, is rather pointless. I mean who does Gene the florist even think she is?! But it does come back and, again, is completely normal.

Planning The Hen Do

True, you will want to hurt everyone involved at some point but be reminded that it’s about the bride and getting her as drunk as possible, in celebration of her upcoming nuptials. Everyone will be super ‘up for it’ before being slammed with the cheapest prices possible, so be prepared to lose out on a few deposits and have a tissue to hand for the stress tears. They’re sure to flow like the Nile.

Of course the hen do is also heaps of fun and will restore your faith in mankind once mastered and completed under your reign. Because of course, you are the master of all weddings.


It’s easy to lose your wedding spark, but it does come back and you’ll be back to bagging wedding favours alongside the bride, with a glass of wine and a smile on your face in no time.

Finding The Shoes

Think you’ll leave them ’til last? Error 101.

The Day Is Nigh

It’s here, it’s all been worth it. Guzzle on copious amounts of prosecco, ensure that the bride does the same and invent a code amongst the bridal party that alerts the insiders to any foul play throughout the wedding.

It’s time to get this one married off and have a party while doing so!

Image credit: Unsplash