By Sam Grisdale
Everyone knows that Christmas is one of the most stressful times of the year, and it’s no surprise when you have to put up with these annoying habits of your other half…
Your beau is cold so they turn the fire on, forgetting to move your advent calendar out of the heat. Your chocolates have turn to molton lava and your heart breaks because R.I.P Lindor.
Put your calendar in the fridge to try to fix the melty mess. If that fails, swap the calendars around and plead ignorance. Not even sorry.
You’ve scheduled in a showing of Love Actually in the comfort of your own home, along with a bundle of blankets and snacks galore, however bae has just told you they’re going out for last minute Christmas drinks with their besties and tells you not to wait up.
Make the most of your impromptu evening in on your tod and have a cute lil pamper night whilst watching your face film with all the trimmings including mani, pedi, face mask and a glass/bottle of wine of the side.
You’ve agreed to do no presents to each other as you already have the greatest gift in the world. Each other. Aw! However, come Christmas day there’s a present under the tree from you but not one to you.
Everyone knows when a girl says she doesn’t want a present it’s a little white lie. Should’ve bought them a book titled Unlocking The Secrets Of Girl Code. Grrr.
Remember you did agree to the no present rule, and just think about all the times they’ve paid for dinner dates, flowers, chocolates and put up with your menstrual moods. Also, Christmas isn’t just about the gifts, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go out in the sales and treat yo’self to make up for it.
You want your babe to come to your families Christmas Day festivities, but they want you to come to their families festivities.
Having a partner is all about compromise, especially when it comes to things that are important to both of you such as family. You can try the ‘this year at mine, next years at yours’ trick, or have Christmas Day at yours and invite both sides of the family round. Everyone knows peak adulthood is hosting Christmas Day.
This Christmas is actually the first time your parents are meeting your new babe, and there’s too many scenes of Gaylord Focker meeting the Byrnes family running through your mind.
Try to fill your partner in as much as possible on what your parents and siblings are like and most importantly their sense of humour. Nothing will make you want the ground to swallow you up more than hearing your partner make a joke that isn’t to everyone’s tastes.
Plead willingly with those Bambi eyes of yours for them to be on their best behaviour and promise you’ll give a VERY special present as a thank you in return.
Too much turkey has been eaten, copious amounts of Bailey’s has been drunk and you’re ready to settle down in front of the TV with a cuppa and a box of Celebrations. You realise the last Malteaser has been eaten by your so-called life partner and you let out a genuine sob.
Open the next tin and eat your way through the symptoms of your food coma.
Note to lover: Despite all the extra stress you put us through at this time of year, you know that all we want for Christmas is…you xo
GIF source: Giphy